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Banana
Republic:
Memories of a Suburban Irish Childhood
By Joseph O'Connor
IN
THE SUMMER OF 1977 I was thirteen years old and pretty miserable
with my life. My
parents' marriage unhappy for a long time had finally
disintegrated in acrimonious circumstances.
We
lived in Glenageary, a middle-class housing estate in southside
Dublin. There was a large stain caused by damp on the gable wall
of our house, and if you glanced at it in a certain light, it
looked exactly like the map of Ireland. I always thought this
meant something important, but I could never figure out what.
In the summer of 1977, with only myself and my mother
living there now, the house seemed unutterably empty,
haunted by lost expectations.
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We
didn't see eye to eye, my mother and myself. Sometimes, when
we argued, she would throw me out of the house; other
times I would simply walk out to get away from her. So
I spent a good deal of the very hot summer of 1977
just wandering the streets of Dublin, by myself. |
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And
an odd thing was happening in Dublin in the summer of 1977. At
first, in my hometown, punk rock was nothing much more than a
feeling. I mean, nobody knew very
much about it. Punk had been initially perceived as just another
English invention, I suppose; another weird Limey oddity, in
the same culturally wacko league as eel pie and pantomime dames.
Its important to say that this was a time when Dublin did not
really figure on the world rock and roll map. We had
Thin Lizzy and occasional gigs by Rory Gallagher, a handful
of younger Irish bands. There was a quartet of northside born-again
Christians who played Peter Frampton songs, and who, it was
said by some, would never amount to much. (That summer, they
were changing their name from The Hype to U2.) And that was
about it. The city had no pop culture. But in the summer of
1977, when I was thirteen years old, into this vacuum stepped
a monstrous and slavering spirit.
I
got a job that July, on a local building site. One of the
labourers was a cadaverous, scrawny young fella, and it turned
out that he would play a significant role in my musical
education. Hubert was about nineteen, from a nearby
working-class suburb which he sometimes referred to as
Sallyfuckinnoggin. His language was flamboyantly atrocious, and
so was his skin.
There
were two things that made Huberts life complete. The first was
pornography. The second was punk rock. He loved it. He
absolutely adored punk rock, and he would talk to me about it
for hours at a time. He told me about an establishment in town
called Morans Hotel, in the basement of which there were punk
rock concerts almost every night. It was all about being
'against society', he said; it was about 'smashing the system'.
Hubert himself was 'against society, he assured me fervently.
There were legions of people in the basement of Moran's Hotel
every night of the week who were also 'against society', and
they had stuck safety pins through their ears, cheeks and noses
to prove it.
The
bands who played in Moran's Hotel were against society too, all
of them. But the worst of the lot, Hubert confided, the mankiest
shower of louse-ridden, no-good, low-down bowsies ever to plug
in a Marshall, ram up the volume and hammer out a three-chord
trick, was a year-old band called The Boomtown Rats. They were
'fuckin' scum,' Hubert would say, and he would smile in
a fondly contented way when he said this, as though attaining
the state of fuckin' scumhood was a development in which
a person would take considerable pride. 'They
don't even fuckin' wash themselves, he would beam diabolically,
although how he was in a position to know such a thing remained
unrevealed (perhaps mercifully). |
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I
would
have loved to go to Moran's Hotel, of course, but being
under-age, I couldn't. Yet I was frantically curious about this
crowd of licentious and festering reprobates, The Boomtown Rats.
I wondered what they would be like. The only real-life
pop star I had ever actually seen was Gary Glitter, miming I
Love You Love in a television studio at RTE. I wondered if these
Boomtown Rats could possibly be as entertaining as Gary. Well,
one day Hubert told me that I would soon have a chance to find
out. The Boomtown
Rats had been booked to play a big outdoor show in Dalymount
Park soccer ground. Hubert had bought me a ticket as a present.
That August
afternoon, having lied to my mother about my destination - I
think I said I was going to a boy-scouts' day out - I went to
the concert with Hubert and his beloved, Mona. Mona was a
healthy-looking girl, with the arms of a docker and a
bewildering vocabulary of That August afternoon, having lied to
my mother about my destination - I think I said I was going to a
boy-scouts' day out - I went to the concert with Hubert and his
beloved, Mona. Mona was blasphemies and curse words. All her
visible garments were made of leather, a fact I found arresting
in the extreme, mainly because, apart from my shoes, the only
leather garment I myself possessed at the time was a scapular.
It was a very hot day and the stadium was packed. Thin Lizzy and
Fairport Convention were headlining the concert, but I did not
care about that, mainly because Hubert had discreetly advised
that these bands were not sufficiently 'against society'.
So, like my mentor and Mona, I only cared about The
Boomtown Rats. When their arrival was announced over the PA
system, I thought Hubert was going to ascend body and soul into
heaven, Virgin Mary-wise, so screechingly enthusiastic did he
become.
I
had never experienced anything quite like the phenomenal
excitement as the band sloped onto the stage, picked up their
instruments and began to play. I felt as though a lightning
storm was flickering through my nerve endings. It's something
you never really forget, the first time you hear the scream of
an electric guitar, the thud of a bass, or the clash of a real
hi-hat cymbal. The lead singer, Bob Geldof, looked like an
emaciated and drooling Beelzebub, as he leapt and tottered
around the boards, spitting these extraordinary lyrics into his
microphone. The keyboard player, Johnny 'Fingers' Moylett, wore
pyjamas on stage, an act of the most unspeakable and
unprecedented sartorial anarchy. The bassist, Pete Briquette,
lurched up and down, leering dementedly, as though suffering
from a particularly unpleasant strain of bovine spongiform
encephalopathy. And if guitarists Gerry Cott and Gary Roberts,
and drummer Simon Crowe, looked relatively normal, you still
would have had not inconsiderable reservations about the
prospect of any one of them babysitting your sister.
They
played their music frantic and fast, incredibly LOUD, with a
curious mixture of passion, commitment and utter disdain for the
audience. I loved them. I had never heard a noise like this in
my life. I was nailed to the ground by it. When they thrashed
into their first single 'Looking After Number One', I swear to
you, every single hair on my body stood up.
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Don't
give me love thy neighbour! Don't give me charity!
Don't
give me peace and love from your good lord above!
You're
always gettin' in my way with your stupid ideas!
I don't want to be like you.
I
don't want to be like you.
I
don't want to be like you.
I'm
gonna be like ME!
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Now,
this was what I called music. I staggered home that night with
my head pounding and my heart reeling.
My mother was waiting, of course, and she spent several
centuries yelling at me, which made my headache even worse.
But I felt empowered by the music, I really did.
It sounds so naive now, I know, but that's the way it
was. I felt I had witnessed a kind of revelation. Suddenly it
seemed that life was actually pretty straightforward. All you
had to do, if someone was getting on your case, was tell them to
fuck away off, that you didn't want to be like them,
that you wanted to he like YOU! I tried it out on my mother and
she didn't exactly see things my way, to put it mildly. But it
was the summer of 1977, you see. It all seemed very simple.
Back
in school in September, I told my friends all about The Boomtown
Rats. These pals and myself felt we had something in common, in
some odd way. I think we felt we had experienced more
interesting pain than other people had, although, of course,
being teenage boys, we didn't talk much about such things.
It turned out that my mate Conor had heard about The
Boomtown Rats himself. He
had read an article about them in Hot
Press magazine, in which it was revealed that Bob Geldof had
been to our school.
If
I had been interested in the Rats before, my enthusiasm rocketed
through the roof now. These leprous anti-establishment scumbags
had actually attended my school.
Blackrock College, this priest-run joint long famous for
churning out obedient wageslaves had somehow produced The
Boomtown Rats! How had this possibly happened?
There was hope for us all.
One
evening that autumn, Bob Geldof and the Rats were booked to
appear on 'The Late Late Show'.
Once again, I lied to my mother, so that I could get out
of the house and go up to my friend's place to watch this.
The
atmosphere in my friend's living room was electric, as we
uncapped the shandy bottles, passed around the solitary
spit-soaked cigarette, and waited for the messiah to descend.
Bob shambled onto the screen like an evil, bedraggled wino and
sneered his way through the interview in a furtive southside
drawl. He detested
many things about Ireland, he said.
He loathed the Catholic Church; he hated the priests who
had taught him in Blackrock College, he disliked his father. He
had only gotten into rock and roll in order to get drunk and get
laid. Almost
everything he said was greeted with horrified gasps and massed
tongue-clickings from the audience, and wild cheers from my
friends and myself. When
the interview was over, the rest of the band slouched on,
looking very much as though they had just woken up in a skip,
and thundered into 'Mary of the Fourth Form', a feverish song
about the seduction of a schoolteacher by a female student.
The Late Late Show had witnessed many exciting events
throughout its long and colourful history, but never a youth
playing the piano in his pyjamas. As the number climaxed in a
clamour of drums and wailing feedback, the studio audience was
absolutely stunned.
'Well
done, Bob,' smiled the nervous host.
Geldof turned around, scowling, wiping the saliva from
his lips with the back of his hand.
'Well, if you liked it so much,' he snapped, 'go and buy
the record.' Fuck! The
guy was giving cheek to the great Gay Byrne now!
Well, this was something new and dangerous.
This was practically revolution.
In
Ireland, in the late 1970s, this was absolutely astounding talk.
This was the decade when one million people almost a
third of the entire population of the state - had attended a
mass said by the Pope in Dublin's Phoenix Park. This was many
years before Mary Robinson, or the divorce debate, or the
legalisation of gay rights in Ireland. You could not legally buy
a condom in Ireland in the 1970s, never mind go on the
television and talk so blithely about getting drunk and getting
laid and hating priests and disliking your father. And although
I liked my own father a lot, Geldof's pungent cocktail of
motormouth arrogance, unwise trousers and disrespect for
authority really did appeal to me.
In time, I couldn't get enough of it.
Soon
after The Late Late Show, my friend Conor got a copy of The
Boomtown Rats' first record and he taped it for me. It wasn't
really punk at all, in fact; it was souped-up rhythm and blues
played with a lot of aggression. But there were some fantastic
songs on it. 'Never
Bite the Hand That Feeds' and 'Neon Heart', for instance. The
music was raw, brimming with verve and a crisp visceral energy.
But there were other things I admired about it.
The songs were full of characters, and I liked that.
It made the songs seem like they were about real people.
And there was a surprising facility for language; a gutsy
pared-down approach to storytelling. |
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Sooner
or later, the dawn came breaking,
The
joint was jumping and the walls were shaking,
When
Joey sneaked in the back door way, Pretending he was
with the band, he never used to pay; He was never a
great draw for pulling the chicks, He'd just lie against
the wall like he was holding up the bricks. |
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But
on The Boomtown Rats' first record there was also a slow
piano-based ballad called 'I Can Make It If You Can'.
It was a tender song of vulnerability and longing. I kept
the tape beside my bed, and I would put on 'I Can Make It If You
Can' every morning as soon as I woke up. I felt that this was
the voice of a survivor, a guy who knew about pain. I felt he
was singing to me, and to people like me, and that there was
some kind of integrity to what he was doing. I played the tape
until it wore out and couldn't be played any more.
And there were many mornings around that time - I don't
mind saying it - when that song helped me to get out of bed. I
can make it if you can.
I
was so full of fear in those days that I would often feel it
clenched up inside me, like a fist, literally; like a physical
thing. My life
sometimes felt meaningless. It was hard to see a future of any
kind. It is a terrible thing to feel so hopeless when you're so
young, but I did for a while, and I have to say it honestly. No
teacher, no priest, ever lifted a finger to help my family.
There were three things, and three things only, which kept me
going throughout those years.
One was the love of my father, which was constantly and
unselfishly given. The second was the support of my brother and
sisters and friends. And
the third was Bob Geldof.
I
would listen to him singing 'I Can Make It If You Can', and I
would believe it. I simply felt that I could make it if Bob
Geldof could. I
know I was utterly naive to think that, but I'm grateful now for
the naivety of youth. I associated myself with Bob Geldof.
He became a paradigm of survival, toughness and courage.
He would never ever
get ground down by anything, I felt, and thus, if I remembered
that, neither would I. As time went on, I began to think more
about Bob Geldof and his band. I derived an active personal
pleasure from anything the Rats got up to. I bought everything
they released - 'She's So Modern', 'Like Clockwork', then the
magnificent album A Tonic
for the Troops. I
really did think their success had something to do with me.
I felt I was involved in it, inextricably linked to it,
bound up with it in ways that nobody else could understand. I
felt they were singing to me and to the people I knew. I thought
of them as my friends, even though I had never met them.
In
November 1978, anyway, The Boomtown Rats became the first Irish
group of the era to get to the top of the British charts. On
'Top of the Pops' that week, as he jabbered the brilliant lyric
of 'Rat Trap' into his mike, Geldof ripped up a poster of Olivia
Newton John and John Travolta, whose twee single 'Summer Nights'
the Rats had just ousted from the number one slot.
In school, my friends and I were speechless with pride.
Conor cut a photograph of Geldof out of the Hot
Press and we stuck it up in the Hall of Fame, where the
framed images of all the famous past pupils of the school had
been hung. We stuck Bob up there, among the bishops and
diplomats and politicians who had founded the state in which we
lived. His gawky, grubby face fitted exactly over a photograph
of former President Eamon de Valera, and this fact had the kind
of exotically cheap symbolism that appeals very greatly to
fourteen year-olds. It
felt like a victory of sorts at the time, and if I am honest, it
still does.
I
listened to The Boomtown Rats all the time. I would listen to
them for hours on end, and let them send me into a kind of
comforting trance. 'I
Don't Like Mondays', 'Diamond Smiles', I knew the words of their
songs
off by heart. I would recite them, over and over again in my
head, over and over. There were many nights when I went to sleep
with the words of 'I Don't Like Mondays' rattling around in my
mind, and many mornings when I woke up still silently reciting
them, like a prayer.
In
December 1979, The Boomtown Rats came back to Ireland.
They were supposed to play a big concert, but had been
denied permission by the authorities at the last minute. The
Boomtown Rats were seen as dangerous in Ireland, such was the
murderous innocence of the times. The band took the authorities
to court, and lost. That
Christmas, my parents were back in court too. I went along
myself, but the judge told me to leave. When I came out of the
courtroom and into the huge circular hall of the Four Courts
building in Dublin, I was upset. But an odd thing happened,
then. Fachtna O'Ceallaigh, The Boomtown Rats' young manager, was
standing across the hall with his lawyers He was just kind of
standing there with his hands in his pockets, looking cool as
fuck. He might have been wearing sunglasses, although I'm not
sure. Certainly, he was one of the few people present not
wearing a wig. But I was very glad to see him. I felt it was a
good omen. It made
me think of Bob.
Christmas
was dreadful that year. Terrible. The atmosphere in the house
was one of pure fear. Early
in the new year the Rats released - unleashed would be a better
word - the single 'Banana Republic', which deftly summed up
their feelings about Ireland.
By now, they were feelings that coincided greatly with my
own.
Banana
Republic, septic isle,
Suffer in the screaming sea, It sounds
like dying, dying, dying Everywhere I go now And everywhere I
see, The black and blue uniforms, Police and priests
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It
was a devastating attack on a society whose achievements in
posturing cant and hypocrisy had so far outstripped its
achievements in morality. It was delivered with lacerating
power, at a time when it needed to be so delivered.
Nobody but Geldof would have had the guts to do it. I
don't know how anyone else felt about it at the time, and I
don't care. I admired Geldof for calling it the way he saw it.
I still do admire him for that.
But
it was to be the last big single for The Boomtown Rats.
Not long after 'Banana Republic', things started to wane
for them. There were rumours of drug-taking in and around the
band, I don't really know if they were true or not. One way or
the other, I think the Rats simply began to lose their way as
the tastes of the record-buying public started to change. But I
still chart where I was in those days, and what I was doing, by
remembering their singles. 'Elephant's Graveyard' was January
1981, the month after my parents' last court case.
'House on Fire was August 1981, the month my mother had
to go into hospital.
There
were a brief couple of days when we stayed in the house by
ourselves and went pretty wild, my siblings and I. We stayed up
till dawn, we painted the words FUCK THE POPE and BOOMTOWN RATS
across the front doors of the garage. We were drunk with
freedom. We practically trashed the house. We had the Rats on
loud, almost all the time. That's what I remember now, the
intoxicating light-headedness of fear and freedom, the thud of
the bass coming up through the floorboards, and the nasal roar
of Geldof's voice. When you're in trouble, it is odd where you
find consolation.
One
Sunday afternoon, not long after my mother came back, my two
sisters ran away and returned to my fathers home, where they
were treated with the love, affection and respect they deserved.
They never came back to Glenageary again.
'Never
in a Million Years' was released in November 1981, just after I
started college. That
month, things got too much for me at home and I moved out too.
One day, when I went to see my brother, who was still
living with my mother, he had brought along the copy of Tonic
for the Troops which
Id left in the house on the day I had finally run away. That
tore me to pieces, I don't know why.
'House
of Fire' was released in February 1982, when I was going out
with a girl called Grace Porter.
'Charmed Lives' was June the same year, just after we
broke up. 'Nothing
Happened Today' came out in August 1982, just after I finished
my first-year exams. Almost everything that happened to me in
those days, I am
able to mark with a song by The Boomtown Rats.
The
single 'Drag Me Down' came out in May 1984. I remember this,
because I bought it one cold afternoon in Dun Laoghaire before
catching the bus up to visit my mother. We had a violent
argument and parted on bad terms. It was the last time
I would ever see her. She died nine months later in a car crash.
I ran away to Nicaragua to be by myself. I took a tape of the
Rats' last album, In
the Long Grass that included the beautiful single of that
year Dave.
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Flirt with
death
But never kiss Her
I see you bleed
I know you feel the
squeeze
But please, believe
The view from on your knees
Deceives
Keep going
And
I took a tape
of their last ever single, 'A Hold of Me'.
In some ways I wanted to forget about home, and
in other ways I wanted to remember every last thing.
I
often thought about the old days, and sometimes when I
did, The Boomtown Rats would come into my mind. Live Aid
had happened earlier that summer and Geldof was probably
the most famous person in the world by now. But the band
hadn't made a record in a long time, and they seemed to
have no plans to do so.
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And
then, in May 1986, amid rumours that the band was about to call
it a day for good, they came back to Dublin to play at a charity
event, featuring Van Morrison, U2, the Pogues, all the great
and the good of the Irish rock world. The Rats played
a stormer. They blew everyone away and received a tumultuous
reception from the audience. After the main set, Geldof
strolled up to the microphone for an encore. He seemed
taken aback by the warmth of the crowd's affection. At
first - unusually - he didn't seem to know what to say. He
appeared a little lost as his eyes ranged over the crowd. 'Well,
it's been a great ten years,' he muttered, then. 'So, rest
in peace.'
The
thundering drum roll began.
The opening riff pounded out.
The familiar chords, D, A, G, E. The last song The
Boomtown Rats ever played in public was their first song,
Geldof's hymn to snot-nosed anarchy and adolescent attitude,
'Looking After Number One'.
Don't
give me love thy neighbour,
Don't
give me charity,
Don't
give me peace and love from your good lord above
I'M
GONNA BE LIKE ME!!
It
was at once a powerful homecoming, a stylishly ironic act of
self-deprecation and a poignant farewell.
And in some odd but profound sense, it seemed like a
farewell to me too, a final goodbye to a time in my life that
was over now. As I watched the show on television that day, I
knew that I would leave Ireland again soon, that I wouldnt come
back for a long time, that I would try to move on.
Gradually
I lost touch with my old schoolfriends. I moved flat five or six
times in London, and somewhere along the way I left behind all
my old Boomtown Rats records. But I remember their force and
power still, the healing power of their righteous indignation.
And I suppose that sometimes the words don't seem quite
as electrifying now as they did in Dalymount Park on a summer
day when I was thirteen years old and breathless with discovery.
But that doesn't bother me much.
Because great pop music sometimes heals us in ways that
we don't understand, or in ways that seem unbelievably trite or
trivial when we look back. Great pop music is about the people
who listen to it, and the circumstances in which they do so, and
not really in the end about the people who make it.
Maybe that's what's so great about it. I don't know.
Last
year, I was on a television programme in Ireland to talk a novel
of mine, and Bob Geldof was one of the guests. He was absolutely
great. He had the
air of a survivor. He
seemed like a man who had come through.
In
the green room after the show we chatted for a while about
nothing at all, his eyes flitting restlessly around the room as
he talked, his fingers running through his straggly hair. When
the time came to go, we shook hands and he got his stuff
together and sloped from the room, a battered guitar case under
his arm. It was
like watching a part of your past walk out the door.
I
never got the chance to tell him what was on my mind that night.
There were too many people around, and, anyway, I suppose
I hadn't really found the words I was looking for.
But when I think about it now, what I wanted to say was
actually very simple. It
was this: when I was a scared kid, who felt that there was
little point to life, his music and his example were second only
to the love of my father and my stepmother and my brother and
sisters in keeping me going through all the terror and misery.
It helped me survive.
It helped me sit out the dark days, and wait for the
better times to come. They did come. They often do. But before
they did, Bob was there. His music embodied a worldview with
which I felt I had some connection.
It opened my eyes to things that had never occurred to me
before. Like the
greatest pop music, it was fun, unpredictable, alive,
iconoclastic, intelligent, witty, danceable, tender when it
wanted to be, tough as nails when it had to be.
It just made me feel better.
It healed. And
it made me think I could make it, if he could. A foolish and
adolescent belief, if ever there was one.
But in a world where I had to grow up too fast, at least
Bob Geldof and his band allowed me to be foolish and adolescent
just once in a while. I'm
grateful indeed, for that little, or that much. I'm very
grateful for that.
From
The Irish Male at Home
and Abroad (New Island Books/Minerva)
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